Button Button

And we made these little buttons. I bet you wanna put them on your shirt.

Here's something that Austin and I made tonight for my Facebook page. Cool right?

Masters of Misogyny

Utah loves it's men, and appreciates the aesthetics of a "good" woman,  that's all!

Nothing weird about it. Not to me.

Cheers, team.

Get Hooked On Books!

Any but the one for faces.

Right now facebook has launched a new format of their site, and so help me I want to strangle Mark Zuckerberg because the revamp has clogged the system. Jammed the gears. Thrown a stick in the spokes. Disturbed the balance. Foiled the cogs of the big machine.

I need to know what latino night invites I'm missing out on.

Have I been tagged in any photos from Justin's wedding yet?

Is my inbox ripe with gardening reminders and trashola from The Sugar Rush Kids?

I will never know, because even my mongoose of a computer can't get into my account to tell me. And for this I blame my teachers. Why couldn't you make East of Eden more compelling than Instant Messenger? 

Cynthia Skelton of the Montgomery County Public School System, (whose name I add in here, hoping that ultimately she will google herself and stumble across my humble blog) you are the only teacher I ever had in 12 years of piss-poor indoctrination that ever made a lick of sense to me. Infect the world, love. 

Facebook, you've got me. Hook, line and stinker. I wish it weren't so, but I just can't let you go.

Maybe your crash is the beginning of something great for me. Maybe I'll read Oliver Twist. And maybe I'll just wait until tomorrow morning when you will be fully operational once more. Streamlined and slick as a seal in margarine.

Mark Zuckerberg, I hate you but, You're the best.

Beauty School Drop Out

I went to class yesterday. The Doctrine ampersand Covenants. My teacher looked strikingly like Martin Scorsese for a man that teaches religion to the religiously minded. This wasn't a problem for me. I can learn to listen to a syrupy, slow version of one of cinema's true remaining champions. I was much more squirmy knowing that only 24 hours earlier I had arrived home from a nearly week long visit to this glorious nations westernmost edge. 

His words droned on, providing a gapless background score for my much more enticing thoughts. I wondered if summer was really the best time for college. I wondered about how much money they pay you in the seedy back alleys of the medical community for spinal taps and thigh-skin samples. I wondered where I would be more likely to find myself a suitable cuddle companion. I wondered how many of my friends had opted to give school the slip.

I sat, scarcely making out names like "Sidney Rigdon" and "Brother Brigham", and decided to call on the sage wisdom of a few friends, instead of listening intently. "Give me ONE reason to stay in school. Otherwise I'm gone", said the mass text. I waited, as many of my generation do, in cyber limbo. Waiting for an indecipherable and emphatically ambiguous response from someone. Anyone. 

But in my waiting, a high pitched electric scream slid in under the door. A confused room of eager pupils looked heavenward, as it were, to identify the sound. Fire alarm. Just then, three texts came back informing me to GET OUT. I got my answer. From above? Hard to say. What is true, though, is that this school is too dangerous for the summer. So I slipped on my shades and never looked back.

It's hot outside. Go get weird. That's what I'm up to.

You're the best.

American Grandma

Today my Mutie hung up on me to vote for David Cook on American Idol. She distractedly held a conversation with me for about five minutes at the end of which she muttered "1-866-idols-01" and quickly filed me away. I have taken a back seat to this impostor Cook. I hope he loses, so I can have my grandma back. Vote Archuleta.

You're the best.

El Gordo

I love the song "If You Could Read My Mind" by Gordon Lightfoot. I hear the last minute of it on the radio periodically and have never before made an attempt to find out who sings it. I'm not sure it relates to me. I'm not sure it has to. It's catchy. I'll stretch it to make it fit. Maybe I'll let you in on how it applies to me later. 

Other songs that I love too much to be ashamed of loving:

Melissa Manchester - Don't Cry Out Loud

Glen Campbell - Rhinestone Cowboy

Don McLean - Miss American Pie

The Stone Poneys - Different Drum

Vitamin C - The Graduation Song

Billy Joel - Movin' Out

Fallout Boy - Sugar, We're Going Down

Tim McGraw - Something Like That

Dixie Chicks - Travellin' Soldier

Elton John - Daniel

Elvis Presley - In The Ghetto

Goo Goo Dolls - Iris

Good Charlotte - The Motivation Proclamation

Jethro Tull - Thick As A Brick

Joe Cocker - Up Where We Belong

Lil' Troy - Wanna Be A Balla

Limp Bizkit - My Way

Linda Rondstadt - Somewhere Out There

Linkin Park - One Step Closer

Nelly - Luvin' Me

Bone Thugz N' Harmony - Home (feat. Phil Collins)

P.O.D. - Youth Of The Nation

Pink - Just Like A Pill, Don't Let Me Get Me

R.E.M. - E-Bow The Letter

R. Kelly - The Worlds Greatest

Rob Thomas - Lonely No More

Ryan Shupe - Dream Big

The Sounds - Dance With Me

I guess that's it for now. I'd love to hear yours. I'd also love to hear that I'm not alone on some of these. But even if I am, I will sing these loud and proud.

You're the best.